Saturday, July 28, 2007


"Yesterday", said V. "S called me to tell me about it. I think everyone from our batch knows by now."
"I doubt it", remarked M. "He wasn't a very social guy, was he? To be truthful, I know he counted me as one of his closest friends, but I always felt like there was very little of him that I knew. But then now might not be the appropriate time for this discussion. Not when we head towards his funeral"
V looked out of the window as the yellowing eucalyptus trees sped past him. He was still unsure about how he would react once he sees R lying lifeless. The R he was used to seeing was always buoyant, laughing, cheerful, and full of life. But then, as M said, how much of him did they know?

He looked around in awe at the array of lights that blinded him. Blinking, he tried to recall the happenings of the past few years. He had just been run over by a speeding sedan, but R felt no pain. There wasn't a soul to be seen and the silence rang deafeningly in his ears.
"So, this is it", he thought to himself. "It has ended finally, has it?"
"What?", rang a sonorous voice in him.
"Life. My stay on earth."
He waited expectantly for a response.
"Do they miss me? Does anyone miss me?", he thought to himself.
And then it came. He felt himself thrown into a tunnel of blinding light, and the tunnel ended as abruptly as it had begun.

He stood in his room. Unmindful of his presence, his mother went on with her chores. There were creases on her forehead, he noticed, wondering whether they were there when he was alive. Pained but helpless, he looked away. He saw his sister conversing in whispers with his aunt. An air of tragedy hung over the house, consuming everybody.

"He was a 'nobody' really. I was talking to M' the other day, and she didn't even remember him from school", said A.
"Well, I don't agree with you. He might not have been active in your social circles, but he had a whole world inside him. I knew him inside out", claimed K.

R was strangely indifferent to this conversation. They didn't matter to him in the true sense of the word. Just as he had not mattered to them when he lived. He remembered his aching desires to be someone else. Someone who was liked and was good enough to claim his rightful position in this world. He remembered his aching desire to move away from being mediocre. He remembered the long nights he spent hating himself for being who he was.

But it mattered no more. All of this seemed distant to him.

(To be continued)